down. Finish that last donut off and throw the box away.
• Incomplete consent forms. Don't you just love it when sur-
geons add additional stuff to the consent and you don't find out
about it until you go to talk to the patient and confirm the con-
sent? The old codger knows full well that stuff is not going to be
pulled. It wasn't on the schedule. Dr. Massengill's going to be a
hemorrhoid about it because he doesn't have what he needs for
what he added on. Duh? He could have prevented it by using 1 of
the 2 phones he carries to call us. We could have gotten some
assistance to pull those things and we could still start on time.
Maybe.
• Tangled tubing. How does IV and oxygen tubing get hooked
around things like the stretcher's brake pedal, the railing, the OR
bed, my pocket and my badge? It's like snakes in an OR. Soon as
you notice it, you jerk the stretcher to a halt, pulling the tubing on
the nasal cannula so taut that you nearly give the patient an
unscheduled septoplasty.
• Sinister scrub techs. The surgeon will yell at and blame the
circulator before the beloved scrub. Scrub techs have all the
power in the OR. They can make or break the team. A good
scrub will have what she needs opened or placed in an area to
be opened when needed. A not-so-good scrub? She won't even
have her own gown and gloves open before she scrubs. She'll
run a circulator all over Hell's half acre for something the sur-
geon didn't ask for or need. If she does so out of malice and not
because she's a few sandwiches short of a picnic, I'll call her
out on it and wait for her after work in the parking deck.
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